If I Had the Money That Bezos Had

CollegeHumor

696K بازدید272

    A song about putting Jeff Bezos' $200 billion fortune into context.
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    تاریخ انتشار پیش 5 ماه

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    1. Discord20

      Oof.

    2. Joseph Christie

      OH MY GOD THEY MENTIONED TALLAHASSEE

    3. Timmendor

      Eat the Rich.

    4. Avistew Teague

      When it goes "it's more time that humans have been on the Earth", you need to realise, it's not just slightly more times, it's sixty (60) times. The first every human working minimum wage up to this point would still only have earned 1.66% (recurring) of what Bezos's wealth was at the time of this song.

    5. Deakin Santo

      There are some very communist undertones here

    6. Deakin Santo

      You he doesn't have 196 billion in cash right, there's different level of being a billionaire based on the liquidity of their assets amongst other things

    7. Raka Maulana

      Bezos: Nope Elon musk: let's go to Mars 🤣🤣🤣🤣

    8. tudorjason

      Yes, it is very easy to think about how much good Bezos' wealth could do. But it would be dangerous. Read up on Mansa Musa. If his net worth were around today, he'd be worth $400 billion. At least one year when he traveled from his kingdom of Mali to Mecca for Pilgrimage, he gave away so much gold that he caused massive inflation. It wouldn't be good for America's fragile economy if all that wealth floods the streets.

    9. S E

      The other day I found out the CEO of my company makes $6million a year, and I thought, they'd never hire me for that job because after the first year I'd quit. I'm always confused by the desire of these types of people to keep accumulating more and more money. Why? After the $1million mark, houses start getting gaudy and ugly, you can only drive one car at a time, and vacations where you are completely separated from the rest of humanity seem to me to miss the point of travel.

    10. L Baker

      Bezos makes about 10k a second so in the time it took you to read my comment odds are he made more than your yearly salary.

    11. Brandon B

      Does net worth =capital?

    12. Rob Porter

      Can't wait for all that sweet Bezos cash to start trickling down!

    13. Emilio Alban

      The US has similar wealth inequality to 18th century France. We need to be revolting in the streets.

      1. Tar Boy

        Except the average American middle class citizen in our age lives better than the French monarchs of the 18th century could ever dream of. (Apart from pointless things like sparkly rocks.)

    14. Diana Bacovis

      This is so fucking depressing but i'm still bobing my head.

    15. Kanishk Chaturvedi

      This is misleading he has barely a billion in cash. The rest is in stock. And if you liquidated all the stock suddenly the price will fall down.

    16. John Fritz

      Hate to break it to you but Bezos doesn’t sign off on how much his employees make or how long they have for bathroom breaks.

      1. David Capes

        But as the CEO, he could definitely enforce those changes if he had the will

    17. RalseiPlayz DE

      Let's pay NASA to Terraform the moon so that people can life on it

    18. Matthew Tong

      I love the style of writing, but anyone with financial knowledge knows that his net worth is all tied up in the business. If he had to distribute all that money to the public it would cause more harm then good.

      1. David Capes

        No? Shares in businesses can be sold around without much harm being done. Since poorer individuals are more likely to spend, if he gave it away it would almost certainly provide positive economic stimulus

    19. Shivam Prakash

      I would rather spend my money on stacking nickles to the moon

    20. Tangy Orange

      Lets buy an orange

    21. Gary Marks

      What everyone fails to realize is what they are referring to is his networth. He don't have it all in a bank account it's mostly held in stocks. And it fluctuates. If you despise him so much quit ordering shit from Amazon.

    22. recillia

      There are a few mistakes with the math, but when these errors are corrected, it becomes even more egregious lmao Curing homelessness in the US would actually result in 67 billion left, not 14 billion Also, the distance from the Earth to the Moon is 384,400 km, not 384,400,000 miles; ignoring compression under its own weight, you'd still be able to build 20 stacks, though

    23. runcode Matias

      he actually doesnt have all that money, its all in his amazon stock. so essentially that money is half of Amazons worth not bezos actual money that he can use. if amazon goes under he loses it all.

    24. Medric Adu

      12 million years wow

    25. Chris Boucher

      Infuriating honestly, but was a fun way to illustrate a VERY valid point. Eat the rich?

    26. Matthew Bennett

      Net worth ≠ the amount of money in your bank account. Liquidating some of his assets would massively decrease the amount of money his other assets are worth. Jeff Bezos and his ilk should ABSOLUTELY be taxed FAR more, but rhetoric like this is not based in reality.

    27. AM Nigma

      Is it weird that I want this on Spotify? It's a bop

    28. Señor Stabbing

      Bezos does not have 196 billion dollars, he's net value is worth that much. That means his house, company, car and other possesions is worth 196 billion dollars. To spend that money he would have to dismantle his entire company, wich would make things horrible for people who use Amazon, as well as his employes who would lose their salary. Also paying for everyones cancer treatment is not going to end cancer, same rule goes for almost everything else they wanted Bezos to pay for.

    29. Gamer Rat

      Don't lie, if you had that kind of money you would probably just keep it for yourself, we all know it, we're all greedy

    30. Mammon

      This song was actually pretty good

    31. Piers Spicer

      Now so one with Elon Musk

    32. AHMED RAZA

      Elon musk 🤣

    33. Griffin Tyndorf

      And this is all assuming he doesn't make 250k a minute

    34. Mhm sure

      1:20 good intentions however making everyone in Tallahassee millionaires would destroy the value of the US dollar making it worthless or at least make the value of the dollar drop significantly, so...

    35. Baird Jebo

      According to these numbers, if Jeff Bezos ended homelessness, he wouldn't still have 14 billion dollars. He would still have more than 67 billion dollars. Subtract the cost they have in the yellow bar from Bezos' net worth (also in the yellow bar.)

    36. Zakariye Yusuf

      Still capitalism > communism. I mean if you like coffee!

    37. Rudyolf Schiermeister

      hmmm if only someone had jeff bezos amount of cash

    38. Sam Fish

      And that’s why we should tax the rich

    39. carlos rivas

      You cannot do anything, most of his wealth comes from people who use Amazon, continue to use amazon and the wealth of the country is easily in trilllions of dollars as it is the combined wealth of 200 million people.

    40. Elroy Solondz

      Do they understand 196 billion dollars is his Net Worth, not the money in his bank account.

    41. Massive Cow Breakout 755

      If that Earth to moon graphic was to scale it’d look a lot more impressive because the moon is FAR

    42. Knight Glint

      He probably has significant less money in cash. Networth is a funny thing, you can be rich and completely broke at the same time.

    43. Pranav Lad

      I don't know why but this song is like the best motivation I could ever have in my life! 🤩

    44. Leger KIds

      2:29 I love how the chorus breaks apart for a second.

    45. PDaddy

      But would you tho, u see what I'm saying here. I think you severly overestimate you genoursity

    46. Possibly Enthusiastic YT

      This sucks

    47. CrazySeanYT

      When you realise 99% of his worth isn't actually in his pocket ... and is actually in a useful service that benefits the world in many ways .... he also personally only makes $80k a year ..... he had donated 5% of his net worth to charity so far .

    48. Grassling

      "I could pay for cancer treatment.. for _everyone_ on the Earth." so people that rich *could* effectively cure cancer, but decide not to? thats fucked up.

    49. Khandoker Taseen

      it gets worse/better the longer it comes up again cuz hes gotten SM richer since

    50. pupcuz1

      This is a bop.

    51. Captain Squids

      I mean, then Amazon turns to nothing and that causes more problems

    52. Adrian Normandia

      I think this is the most kid friendly sketch of all of CollegeHumor history

    53. A Hut

      Or I could send giant hunks of metal to mars... I think ill do that!

    54. Madison Myers

      Well, I am now depressed and disgusted.

    55. Doug Rosengard

      Wealth disparity is a huge issue, but the song is a bit misleading. Bezos’ net worth is around $185 billion but he “only” has about $9.5 billion in actual cash. The rest of that is the value of properties and stocks which aren’t something he can just “give to every homeless person” or whatever. It’s not like he can just physically chop up every Amazon distribution center and give pieces of them to cancer patients. Now that being said $9.5 billion in cash is still a ridiculously large amount. He could literally give 99% of that cash away immediately and still have $95 million in his checking account, far more than most people will ever see in their lifetime. If the song wanted to be more accurate it would be lyrics about what you could spend $9.5 billion on, which is certainly a lot of money but not the “pay for all cancer treatment everywhere” amount.

    56. Dank Memer

      Jeff Bezos: im gonna pretend i didnt see that

    57. Atom Heart

      If I had the money that Bezos had, I would fund my own resistance organaztion and bring Amazon to its fucking knees

    58. Highly420

      Im sad now thx

    59. Sune Nielleren

      "If i had the money that Elon has"

    60. WOLFSKULL

      Humanity has failed.

    61. Lost Expert

      I like how they are shiting on jeff but why why wold you do that the guy had done some grate work has just gotten payed for it

      1. david

        If you got the resources to end world hunger, but you don't even pay your employees enough, you are not a good person. Billionaires are social parasites, what would he be without his workers?

    62. Christian Delesie

      the problem with this is that it isnt bezo's money, its his net worth. Liquid assets are not the same thing as net worth. Most of his wealth comes from stocks and share holdings in companies like amazon. Try buying a house with that.

    63. Davin Ulfstedt

      Don’t get me wrong I get it’s a comedy video but these examples are based on his net worth and not the money he has on hand. But yeah really catchy

      1. animeviewer66

        But at the least, the guy has the money to pay his employees above even a living wage and still be fabulously wealthy. At the very least he has enough money to let them take a bathroom break or two.

    64. Levente Tempfli

      If I had the money that the government has, Think of all the things I could do, I could spend Jeff Bezos's money, Like every 9 or 10 days. How much money is it? The national debt will explain If the debt were in nickels, It would stack 7 times to the sun And growing 400 000 miles a day

    65. Kuno Rochat

      This only makes sense if Bezos liquidated all of his assets and such a sell off would greatly decrease his net worth or take so long to do that it wouldn't ever make sense. Most people at that insane level of wealth buy everything on credit and just cashout enough to pay that off when needed instead of cashing everything out all at once. Bezos is not going to be buying any of this stuff on credit and no sane person ever would. To those that don't understand what I'm saying, You probably bought DOGE at the top and will do it again.

      1. animeviewer66

        The point is he could do a lot more to help people and doesn't because he's a greedy capitalist dog. Who took advantage of the system during the time of a pandemic.

    66. Out by the Water in Cape May

      I would buy an island. Make it into a country. Become ultra-dictator of the island, and use my wealth to make expansion plans with artificial islands. Eventually rule nation of great technological advancement and high value, that started from a small island. Become involved and get population. Become a true nation, with a standing army and permanent population.

    67. GG_YT

      This songs a joke but it's really really catchy

    68. Jamie W

      Well, those verses got increasingly personal.

    69. Casual Woomy

      And then the alarm clock rings

    70. B P

      But how much cash on hand does he have not his worth, as like other I'm worth more than I could actually spend

    71. thoroughlyjordan

      At 0:54 the given distance from the Earth to the Moon is waaay off. The average distance is 238,900 mi (384,400 km). It looks like they gave the distance in meters but labeled it miles. That said, the number of stacks is accurate ($196 billion is 3.92 trillion nickels, which can create ~19.88 stacks to the moon).

    72. Courian Taylor

      Is this accurate though

    73. frederick leland

      The unfortunate part of this video is that it is a severe misunderstanding of how Bezos' wealth works. This video assumes that Bezos has 200 Billion in liquid assets AKA cash money, when in reality most of his wealth is tied up in Amazon stock, meaning that unless he is giving out Amazon stock under the agreement that it will never be sold, his wealth would depreciate rapidly. Bezos is beyond well off but the political message of this video is extremely misguided and also essentially boils down to "It's not fair, I want what he has."

      1. david

        And I don't think it's easy, I think it's a combination of luck and hard work, where the luck factor is the dominant one. To start a business it helps to have enough money to fail, extremely few poor people ends up being successful, no matter how much they work. I can guarantee you that he haven't worked enough to deserve that amount of wealth

      2. david

        @frederick leland I have barely ever bought anything on Amazon no, most things doesn't ship to my country. And capitalism is a new phenomenon, civilization have existed for much longer, so that's a reach. In what way are monopolies good for innovation? Many smaller businesses and high competition sounds like a much better situation. Today social mobility in countries like the US are lower than ever. I do believe socialism to be unrealistic, but a version of social democracy seems to be necessary.

      3. frederick leland

        @david He does help people though. Have you ever bought anything on Amazon? If you have than you have benefitted as a result. Without the system of Capitalism the system would be more unfair, no one would be incentivized to share any of their skill, knowledge, product or services, most people would still be hunter-gatherers and a lot more people would starve. Finally, he did work hard for his net worth, if it is so easy then you should be able to do it too and the problem is solved.

      4. david

        He still got enough power to change the world. Of course this song is simplified, but it still holds true that it is unfair that one man owns this much if the worlds resources. It is a symptom of late stage capitalism and I am sure this system will eventually lead to our doom. I am not negativly affected by capitalism myself, but would easily give up my personal privilege if it meant stopping world hunger. We got the resources to do so, but greed inate in the human mind seems to make any fair system impossible to accomplish

    74. Karen Seriously Karen

      A bit of Bill Wurtz there.

    75. John Ivan N. Fortu

      This is very catchy tho

    76. Odysseus

      Eat the rich :-)

    77. Garrott Roddy

      what a lot of people don't understand is a lot of his wealth is in amazon stock so if he were to sell it all and buy some of this stuff than that would mean a big drop in amazon stock leading to a large loss of money for lots of people

    78. darkwoodmovies

      This kind of wealth isn't liquid. Jeff Bezos doesn't have $200B in a bank account, if he funded crazy projects like this he would end up crashing Amazon's stock, which in turn would destroy his own net worth, and he'd probably bring a chunk of the economy down with him.

    79. Marley

      Anyone got the chords for this?

    80. Lee C

      this is really really REALLY fucking good.

    81. apple

      Yeah but he can't sell his company

    82. luminari

      Aww you guys left out that he has $15 for every year since the universe has come into existence :’)

    83. Matthew Cassar

      Ahh, a communist video. So hilarious

      1. david

        Or simply anti monopoly. Even the Republicans hates Amazon, because it is killing of small businesses, making capitalism even worse, with zero social mobility

    84. Cultist of unn

      This is actually a good song huh

    85. asian boy animation

      l love this song

    86. Harukami 12

      Hey if I had the money Bezos has I'd be Bezos and I wouldn't give ya'll shit

    87. Purzius

      Insta liked xD also sad

    88. The Peanut

      had

    89. Shruthi Maniyodath

      Who sang this? It sounds so good

    90. Bryan Yap

      Imagine he actually did these

    91. Damian Zjawiony

      Nice

    92. periwinklecheese

      Well then he wouldn't be #1 if he did all of that so whats the point

      1. periwinklecheese

        @Tyme I'm joking

      2. Tyme

        bruh did you hear what he could do??

    93. Mark Jayzee Ortega

      this is depressing but with a happy tune

    94. Mr. DickButt

      If I had the money that Bezos has... Id probably hoard it too

    95. The All Rounder

      wow this just made me even more depressed

      1. Juan Alberto Velasco

        @carlos rivas better to convince people to riot and kill em all (Bezos, Musk, Gates)

      2. carlos rivas

        @Juan Alberto Velasco Also convince people to stop using Amazon, wait that is not going to happen is it?

      3. carlos rivas

        @Juan Alberto Velasco well this country is worth 21 trillion dollars so guess where the wealth really is, not with the elite. all the rich elite assholes barely make 2 trillion so suck on that, :)!!1

      4. Juan Alberto Velasco

        @carlos rivas he has like 160 billion un liquid. Bezos is an asshole

      5. carlos rivas

        @I am a cat person Well you made him rich, you and 100 million's a year buying stuff from amazon and besides most of his net worth unless he sold his stock in amazon is tied up in Assets, how much liquidity does he have?

    96. Robert Leatherwood

      Is that Nick Lutsko singing? Catchy song!!

    97. Sean Imiegha

      You can tell this was from America from not using the metric system

    98. StoryTimeDave

      I smell... *sniffing* Communism!!

    99. Tom Muggeridge

      I detect a hidden communist agenda in here

    100. none.

      Capitalism sucks.